discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Randomize
