How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Randomize