Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
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