Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
