I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize