GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Randomize
