are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
