were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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