You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
