your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
worst night to have a conscience
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
