Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(702): View more from Nevada

I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

What?

(484): View more from Pennsylvania

A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.

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(217): View more from Illinois

who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?

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(509): View more from Washington

no you're not allowed back

(412): View more from Pennsylvania

come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.

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(509): View more from Washington

As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face

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(214): View more from Texas

Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse

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(480): View more from Arizona

I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.

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