Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I want to walk on stilts...naked
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
