Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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