Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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