Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
