do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
