I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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