I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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