i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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