I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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