Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
