I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Do you have feelings for this penis?
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
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