It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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