Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
