No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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