Having a random hookup so left but love u
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
