do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
