Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
