Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
