Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Of course I have a pirate flag
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
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