if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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