We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
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