is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
