yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
