do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Randomize
