you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
