I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
