He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
