Texts From Last Night · DarkxAngel21's Favorites

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DarkxAngel21's Favorites Texts:

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(773): View more from Illinois

We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food

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(586): View more from Michigan

Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.

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(763): View more from Minnesota

No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested

(612): View more from Minnesota

Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us

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(319): View more from Iowa

On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?

(316): View more from Kansas

Toaster

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(720): View more from Colorado

She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.

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(954): View more from Florida

I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza

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(727): View more from Florida

She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.

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(718): View more from New York

bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch

(917): View more from New York City

I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation

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