Texts From Last Night · KingDong_dot_Com's Favorites

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KingDong_dot_Com's Favorites Texts:

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.

Fav 8 5040 1419
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".

Fav 22 4057 1699
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(760): View more from California

i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them

Fav 7 859 2008
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(313): View more from Michigan

Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"

Fav 41 15649 1618
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(574): View more from Indiana

no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"

Fav 13 1738 9113
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(609): View more from New Jersey

There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled

Fav 8 5536 1247
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.

Fav 6 1237 4024
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(518): View more from New York

Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant

Fav 17 5721 1474
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