Last Night in Mississippi (662)

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  If you ever get divorced...would you call me??

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.

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• (406): View more from Montana

  The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"

  (662): View more from Mississippi

  If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  Look upon your future, America, and despair.

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.

  (662): View more from Mississippi

  Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  I think my moral compass just broke

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  Dont you look at me in that tone of voice

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard

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