U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
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