tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
