I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
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