I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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