I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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