I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
