I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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