I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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