Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
